Gripped by Fear...

You don't have to hang around me too long to know that I have one big fear.  Not the "ew, gross" kind, but the heart stopping, crippling kind.

I joke about it often, but I was reminded this morning how much this fear has hold of my life, and if I'm not careful, can often become a daily hinderance, and in this new season of living, could be a large obstacle in the way of God's mission for Brandon and me.

Today, one of my biggest fears was realized... something I often laugh about and say, "If this ever happens, I would...".

Well it happened.

About 5 minutes from my house this morning, and out of the corner of my eye, I see legs. I'm at a stop light, so I look up, and sure enough there it is. RIGHT above me. It was fast, and it wasn't tiny (granted, it wasn't large either, but the speed more than compensated for the lack of size!). Of course, as soon as I realized what it was, the light turned green.

My heart is racing, I can't take my eyes of the visor, I'm terrified to touch my steering wheel and everything in my body wants to jump out of the car and run for my life. Each time I moved my hands, it would disappear, and then rear it's ugly little face. Terror. I literally begin to feel nauseated.

I make it across the intersection and pull into the CVS parking lot (quite crooked because I couldn't bring myself to put my hands all the way on the steering wheel) and I slide out of my car and fumble to grab my phone amidst my insanity.

A 25 year old woman, almost in tears, hyperventilating in the parking lot, for no good reason. Thank goodness it wasn't busy, or I really would have been embarrassed. To make matters worse, I did eventually have to get back in the car to go to work, although at this point I would have rather walked the 65 miles to Tennille.

But, that wasn't an option. So I grabbed a napkin. A NAPKIN. Yeah RIGHT! But before I totally lost it, I grabbed this little snapshot...

THIS ladies and gentlemen is the face of my fear.

I don't know what it is. It's not just a normal 'I don't like bugs'. I am literally affected to my inner being by the sight of spiders. It is a fear I don't experience with anything else in my life. And I was reminded today that this fear has quite a hold over me. To be 25 years old and literally screaming and jumping in public trying to kill this thing is absurd. Embarrassment and maturity aside... fear is not something we as Christians are supposed to live with. Especially not to the extent that it cripples you so severely you can't think straight!

Our fears are all so different. This may be comical to you and you're probably thinking, 'it's just a spider, and a small one at that', but for 20 minutes this morning, this spider was bigger than any anaconda, more ferocious than any lion, blacker than the depths of the darkest night, and more threatening than an intruder in your home.

I am so tired of being afraid. I am reluctant to sit on the ground and I'll probably look behind my visor for the next 2 weeks before I get in the car. I need your prayers. Because this problem is not something I can overcome on my own. I can laugh it off now, and sit in my little townhouse with my can of bugspray, but in 4 months, I won't have that luxury. Not to mention, they don't make small spiders in Africa...lol.

I want to experience all that God has in store for Brandon and me, and I don't want to be consumed by a fear that everywhere I put my hand, or each time I put my shoes on, or feel something in the dark, the visions of legs and webs pop into my head.

The only thing I want to be consumed with is the fire of the Holy Spirit, the love of God and the Gospel of our Savior. My God is King over my fear, I know he can help me overcome this.

Thank you for loving me, fears and all!


PS... I did eventually kill the spider; 4 good screams, a shoe and 20 minutes later :)

Silence the Stones

Ever thought about the verse from Luke where Jesus says to the Pharisees, "...if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out."? What are we talking here? Like, would it be one, monotone, "Praise God", Ben Stein style? Would some have lower voices or higher voices like yours and mine? I kind of like to think that every single one of the stones would have a very bold way of speaking. If you've seen Austin Powers, think SEND IN THE CLONE!!!! 

Except more like SEND IN THE KING!!!!! Can you imagine?


So here is the scene: Jesus the Savior of mankind has been placed on a donkey and is riding down a street being praised by the people around him. Some of the things the people are saying start to get to the Pharisees (since the Pharisees do not believe Jesus to be the Son of God.) So, the Pharisees pipe in, "Teacher rebuke your disciples." This strikes me as funny since, uh... yeah... if he wanted to do that don't you think he already would have? Like Jesus wasn't listening or couldn't hear what the people were saying? Jesus, in essence, tells them that there is absolutely nothing that anyone could do to stop this praise toward Him because even if the people are silenced it has been prophesied for centuries that He will receive praise at this moment. I think it would have been cool if the Pharisees had actually been able to silence the people around and suddenly out of their own mouths start spouting, "Praise to the King and Hosanna in the Highest". That might have shut them up.


Here is what I do know. I do not ever want to experience the rocks crying out because that means that we as the body of Christ are not boldly praising our God. I know that one of our purposes in life is to praise and worship our God with full abandon. I pray that each person who reads this will take time out of their day to praise the maker of the heavens. He gives each and every one of us breath. He knows the number of hairs on your head, or lack thereof. Praise is not just what he wants. Praise is what he deserves! That is what we hope to achieve in our lives, in our thoughts, even in this blog. Sally and I hope to continuously praise our Father and hope to inspire some others to do the same. We hope that you will join us in our movement to Silence the Stones.

A leap of faith...step by step

SO. Here we are, on the brink of the most important journey of our lives. The journey that leads us hopping in the foot prints left by our Savior, each step requiring more faith than the last, but also more rewarding. Releasing the weight of the world, and putting our trust in God to lead us, to love us and to lend us His strength so that we might fulfill His purpose for our lives: to tell the nations about His Son.

Brandon and I have been Christians all of our lives, but until recently, our 'fruit' didn't really show. Salvation may not be gained by works, but as we've come to realize, if you've accepted Christ, your life can't help but show evidence of His presence in you. When you come to this understanding, it's not easy to continue with every day living, wasting the time we've been allowed, and selfishly keeping the Good News of the Gospel to ourselves.

I got my first taste of missions in 8th grade, when my mother and I went to Bryasnk, Russia with our church. Every year after, until I graduated high school, the highlight of my year was the week we would spend serving with our Russian brothers and sisters. They taught me more about living the Word, then I could have ever understood on my own. Humility is something that is so rare here in the states, and when you see pure passion and love for Christ, uninhibited by pride, you can't help but be changed.

But, as it seems to work out, returning to the over abundance of indulgent activities had it's toll on my calling and my obedience to it. And so I made God wait, setting Him on the back burner as I had my fun and found my place in this world.

Most of you know the story of how Brandon and I met, and how I knew he was the one since about 10th grade (Holly has evidence on video... who knew I was prophetic? haha!) But even after we were married in 2009, knowing that God had worked this plan out since we first met at Georgia Baptist Music Camp in 5th grade, we still had our own plans in mind and put His aside. Why? All of our lives we hear, "the safest place to be is in the center of God's will", and while that is so true, safe doesn't always mean sitting on our couches in a beautiful home filled with luxuries. God's will for our lives is not to spend our time, money, and talents on ourselves and sitting on our hands. God's purpose for us is to share the love of the Creator of the Universe, who sent His one and only Son to die in our place on the altar of Redemption, and who made a way for us to be with Him, again, as it was in the beginning. A time before sickness, before sin.

We are not making Him wait any longer. In January of this year, Brandon and I answered the call that has been placed on our lives from the beginning. A call that is spoken very clearly to each person who professes to be a Christian- to obey, to love, to preach the Gospel of Christ. Our obedience is taking us first to Haiti, to serve on the field with our church, and then to Zambia, Africa for 3 months, to learn how to proclaim the Glory of God to the best of our abilities. We know that God has a plan for our lives. We know that plan involves sharing the love of Christ with as many people as possible. We realize the changes that will take place, hoping they begin in our hearts and then bleed out to the outermost facet of our lives. We know the danger involved, and we understand the hardship that may come our way. But if we truly believe God's Word, than things of this earth should never hold us back. The worst thing that can happen is to die...and for a Christian, isn't that the prize? To see Him, face to face, and have Him say "Well done, my good and faithful servant."

We have so much to learn, and so much to prepare for. We don't have any answers beyond what God has given us so far, but we whole-heartedly trust in his provision, and in his love. And we know, the best and safest place to be is in the center of His Will; His holy, pleasing and perfect Will.

Pray with us, learn with us, and be inspired by God's overwhelming Grace with us.

We love you and thank you all for your support as we embark on the journey of the rest of our lives.


Brandon and Sally Lewis


For more information on our training this year, and ways you can support, email us at brandonandsallymissions@gmail.com .